I weighed in at 173 today. Overall, I’ve lost almost 30 pounds in the year since my brother’s wedding. If I lose 13 pounds more, I will reach the weight goal I set with healthywage.com in January.
How I wish I’d never made that bet against myself!
My instincts knew at the time that it didn’t align with my true goals or any of my philosophies about fitness and health.
I signed up on a whim, and committed to throwing $50 per month into the pot until October. I had already lost ten pounds and I indicated on the site that I wished to lose 30 more.
If I hit my goal weight by October 16th, the whole pot will be divided amongst all the contributors who hit their goals. According to the healthywage site, I will win $750.
I’m only 4 pounds off from being on track to hit that goal and I have two and a half months, or ten weeks, to lose 13 pounds.
I hate that I’m doing this. But… I’m totally doing this.
I’ve been steadily losing half a pound per week eating 1300 calories per day (plus whatever amount my Fitbit says I’ve burned during a workout) and keeping my macros at 30% carbs, 30% fat, and 40% protein.
A week ago, I dropped my calories per day to 1200 (again, plus whatever I burn during a workout) and decreased my carb intake dramatically. My macros are now 15% carbs, 45% fat, and 40% protein.
This puts me at around 50 grams of carbs per day, but since I’m still eating a lot of protein this isn’t the keto diet. This is just very low carb. I know my body will process some of the protein as carbs and for now I’m okay with that.
I hate that I’m doing this. I can’t state that more emphatically. I hate that I’m focusing on my weight. I want to eat more, strength train hard, and work on lowering my body fat percentage and increasing my muscle mass. I don’t want to have to care about the scale.
One hundred and sixty pounds is the maximum “healthy” weight indicated by the World Health Organization for a woman of my height before she is considered, by them, “overweight.” That’s the reason I decided on that particular number.
The scale is not a measurement of health, though, or even of size. And since my ultimate goal, appearance-wise, is to look muscular and toned, focusing on weight is completely counterintuitive.
Yes, I could choose to let it go and focus on the fitness goals that are more important and, in my opinion, more healthy. It’s entirely up to me. I’m mad I signed up for this bet, though, and my fury is fueling my desire to win that $750. (Along with simply wanting $750, of course.)
After October, though… After I’ve hit that goal I set in January and am free of this self-inflicted yoke… Man, I can’t wait to increase my calorie intake and start building my weight back up again. Currently, I weigh 173 pounds. I’ve started a new training program and I’m excited to build muscle and get more toned. But I have to admit, when I look at myself right now? I think I look pretty badass and don’t see much reason to change anything.
Scales are so stupid.