Today is day 4 of avoiding tomatoes and I'm feeling a ton better. Not 100%, but much better than I was. I think I might also be feeling a bit lonely for male companionship. I saw Cookie last Thursday and his hugs may have triggered something. Some memory of how nice it is to feel … Continue reading Thoughts on trying to date again
Depression/Anxiety
Appreciating Stillness
I spent my Friday night reading and listening to the sound of rain pounding down outside my windows. No screens. No music. No TV. (Benefits of a Digital or Screen Detox for ADHD Symptoms) Just the tap tap tap tap tap of raindrops on the metal of my oven vent and the shhhhh of water … Continue reading Appreciating Stillness
Heading Disorientation: Information Needed
The other day I wrote about an episode when I couldn't figure out where I was and it freaked me out. I lost where I was again. My brain fritzed out. I had no idea where I was. I couldn’t figure it out. I froze.My chest constricted and tears welled up and I looked around blankly, … Continue reading Heading Disorientation: Information Needed
Benefits of a Digital or Screen Detox for ADHD Symptoms
Last night, I did not do a digital or screen detox. "Hocus Pocus" was trending on Twitter for a while yesterday. As I had nothing on my calendar last night and planned to paint my nails anyway, how I was going to spend my evening seemed predestined. In a general sense, though, attempting a screen … Continue reading Benefits of a Digital or Screen Detox for ADHD Symptoms
That’s me in the spotlight, losing my direction
Goddammit. Just, fuck. Goddammit. I lost where I was again. My brain fritzed out and I had no idea where I was. I couldn't figure it out. I froze. My chest constricted and tears welled up and I looked around blankly, trying to figure out where the fuck I was and how to get where … Continue reading That’s me in the spotlight, losing my direction
Six ADHD Cooking Hacks
I never realized that my cooking strategies were ADHD hacks until reading a recent post from Black Girl, Lost Keys: Ok, so lots of people don’t cook and they manage, right? So what if you have some challenges with cooking, you can always door dash it right? Here’s why we need to get cooking right. … Continue reading Six ADHD Cooking Hacks
ADHD and me
As mentioned yesterday (You Can't Go Back [update]), my memory is horrible. I remember mentioning it yesterday. I do not, however, remember writing about ADHD on this blog before now. Since I have a terrible memory, I did a search for ADHD. On my own blog. To find out if I've written about ADHD. Because … Continue reading ADHD and me
Story ideas: imagined interactions
I still have conversations in my head with the exN a lot. (exN = the narcissistic ex-partner, otherwise referred to as, "the Narcissist.") Often, I inadvertently fantasize about having to deal with him in some situation or another. Perhaps, he's sick. Or perhaps, it's some other reason. Somehow, he's in need and it's on me … Continue reading Story ideas: imagined interactions
The Horrible Hilarious Herb Scissors Happenstance
Day of joy post: June 13, 2017 I am unpacking in my new home. My things have been in storage for two months. It has been two months since I left the home we owned together and moved in with my friends. And now, I am in my new condo, and I am making my … Continue reading The Horrible Hilarious Herb Scissors Happenstance
Glad To Live in a World with Octobers
Autumn is a new beginning. Not just because of the ingrained rhythm of the beginning of the school year, but also, the Jewish New Year and my birthday. Everything starts fresh in autumn. Plus, autumn brings cooler temperatures and clothing styles I am more comfortable in. Nothing puts me in a good mood quite like … Continue reading Glad To Live in a World with Octobers
Anxious Happiness: How Long Will It Last?
It's counterintuitive to be afraid of being in a good mood. I know for other people, being in a good mood is just a normal thing. For me, it comes so rarely that it causes anxiety. I know that it is a fleeting thing. I don't know how long it is going to last. Inevitably, … Continue reading Anxious Happiness: How Long Will It Last?
On exercise, depression, anxiety, and laziness
Thoughts on exercise, one month ago today It's 6:00 AM. I have my coffee beside me and my cat, Abigail, curled up on my lap. It's cool in my house, far cooler than it's been these past few days. When I rose out of bed I ditched my lightweight summer nightgown and threw on a … Continue reading On exercise, depression, anxiety, and laziness
Anxiety About Pressure
This image was posted in a travel group I belong to and it struck a chord in a huge way: It's me! My "low tire pressure" light on my dash has been on for a few days now and I can't bring myself to do a thing about it. Seriously. The idea of putting some … Continue reading Anxiety About Pressure
Is There Such A Thing As Narcissistic Abuse Recovery?
Is there such a thing as recovery from Narcissistic Abuse? Is it even possible? I keep thinking I'm there and that I've recovered. I've posted about it. I've had long periods of time where I thought I might be back to normal again. I wrote a post about journaling a couple of weeks ago. I … Continue reading Is There Such A Thing As Narcissistic Abuse Recovery?
“We’re out of romance, how about just the anxiety?”
I received the following in a text from Chris yesterday: "I'm sorry but I have to cancel again. I'm just getting the feeling that my life is too messy to make plans right now. I'm sorry for being such a flake." And thus the burgeoning romance ends. Was it something I did? Something I said? … Continue reading “We’re out of romance, how about just the anxiety?”